It’s official!

Yup, today (6/4 China time, 6/3 CA time) we went back to the place where we originally picked up LB and had a LITTLE ceremony in which J and I were officially declared LB’s adoptive parents! I want to emphasize the LITTLE portion of the ceremony as I didn’t even realize we were having a ceremony until it was all over. I need to emphasize this so as to pave the way for my safety when I go home and the momma finds out there is no video of the event. All I got was a quick comment from our guide Daniel as she (yes, this Daniel is a she) along with two other ladies walked up to Jym and Allison, the other couple here in Zhengzhou with us, and I and said something to the effect of “we’ll have a ceremony.” As I am processing this the two ladies standing side by side hand me one red document holder and one to Jym and Allison.  I proceed to open the document holder and the two ladies say something in Chinese which Daniel then translates as “You’re now the official adoptive parents.” “All right!” I think, as  Daniel continues telling us that we need to make sure we hold on to that document as we will need it later at the police station. “Okay. Wait… that’s it?” Well, pray for my safety when I get home and have to try to explain it to the momma.

We then went to the notary. Okay, it’s hot and muggy here, but just doable enough so that I’ve never got much more than a little perspiration going. We start up the stairs and at each floor I keep being surprised because we keep going. Finally at the fifth floor we arrive. So I’m already uncomfortably hot from the mini workout. Then the room is a small office where there is just too much for little hands to get at. At one point LB is trying to get something and I stop him. Of course, as is his SOP, he throws a bit of a temper tantrum. Immediately the people in the office start scrambling to get him something. Next thing I’m being handed two Werther’s Originals. Hard candy, not something I feel comfortable giving a two year old who’s walking around, but even more important, I truly do not want to reward this behavior. I want to break it. So I have to say thanks but no thanks to the offer. I think they thought I was a horrible person based on the looks I was given (and in China they are never people to refrain from looking at you, okay, probably a better word would be stare. Every culture is different!) Anyhow, let’s just suffice it to say that little incident didn’t help to cool the air down for me any.

After that, we had a couple hours back at the hotel in which we Skyped and got some stuff to eat and then we met a different guide, Mr. Liu, down in the lobby to go to the police station where they take care of all the passports. In waiting for the man from the orphanage to get to the police station, Mr. Liu decided to go take us over to a place to get the half dozen or so pictures we needed for the passport process. Of course, this takes a bit of time as they have to have LB in just the exact position to get the exact photo they need, not really something you should expect from a two year old. Finally they are satisfied and we get to get up from all the picture taking. LB is walking around and starting to be a bit of a grump. At one point they stop him from getting something they don’t want him to have and again he throws a bit of an attitude. Now at this point, you need to realize we are well into nap time and I am happy he is doing as well as he is. A while later I was holding him and turned him so he was cradled in my arms. In about 30 seconds he was gone (kind of like he was right now when I laid him down for a nap!). Once we finished there, we went back to the Police Station. I’m struggling to hold this sweaty sleeping baby while trying to get paperwork out of my backpack, trying to sign things (it’s kind of like buying a house, just spread out over a longer time period), etc. Then the gal helping us wants to take his picture. Are you serious? You want me to waken this sleeping baby for a picture? Let’s just say once I tried waking him we had to leave the room for a while. Finally, I decided to try giving him some water to see if that would settle him. It worked briefly, just until we went back in to try the picture again. Then he started melting again. Please Lord?! I try the water thing again and this kid who, once he is done with something  makes it very clear he won’t have anything more to do with that item, actually goes for a second drink. In the brief pause after the drink we were able to get him in position and slip in a quick picture that was satisfactory. Thanks Lord!!

Then back for an actual nap.  I searched for the Korean BBQ place we saw on Google but to no avail, so we eventually ended up in some place with no English anywhere.  We’re all hungry and just decide to try it. Now why is it in some places they hand you the menu and stand there poised to take your order, and just about the time you finish looking at the pictures and decide on three to point to, you look up and they’ve disappeared?! So now I have this progressively melting down two year old (who we’ve determined is like M and does NOT do well post nap) despite my bringing Cheez-its to tide him over while we wait. (I learned that the hard way from our time at Pizza Hut the night before!) Finally a lady returns after I have made a multitude of attempts to get someone’s attention. We start pointing to pictures and all we’re getting in response is “No, no, no.” (Well at least they know that much English! Guess maybe I should work harder on my Chinese.) Finally after rejecting out first three choices, she walks away. I’m slightly confused and considering leaving, when she returns with a tray loaded up with all sorts of different dishes. Ahh, Dim Sum. (Okay, Why the menu then and why were you standing there to take my order???) So we choose four items and are finally able to get a growing fiasco back under control.

Since we’re nearby, we take another trip to WalMart and stock up on all sorts of different items, including several which just looked good, but we weren’t sure what they were. So far they’ve all been winners! I just finished some sort of peach milk thingy. Sweet, but very tasty and refreshing. As we left we some of the dancing that was occuring on three of the four corners of this one intersection, a very interesting Chinese phenomenon.  And then finally back to the hotel room for a very late night.

T-shirt saying of the day, Peace Free Keep Heart.

"Peace" on Gotcha Day

After not sleeping but a couple hours after I woke up thinking that I hadn’t changed out enough money, and then worrying about it for a while before finally getting up and doing something about it, and then wondering what I had done with the receipt for the all the Yuan I had wired, and for which they told me the receipt was as good as cash, and then finally getting up to look for that, and all the time constantly thinking back to what am I going to do with this new boy without his marvelous momma, and what do I do if he cries, and what is he going to eat, and am I going to be able to figure out when he needs to go to the bathroom, and… and… And the night was just like that sentence, it ran on and on. I should probably be napping now in the peace (LB is sleeping and D&G are watching a video) and quiet, but I doubt I’ll be awake later to do this and then I’ll get too far behind, and then I also need to get this room straightened up so LB doesn’t get into everything, and so I can leave him a little space in which to roam, and… and… Do you get yet that the peace is all around me, but not in me at the moment?

So what has happened since I didn’t sleep? Quick trip to the airport leaving the hotel at 0530 for a 0745 flight. About an hour & 20 to Zhengzhou, a short drive to the provincial govt. office, and before I could hardly get out of the van, I hear someone call out LB’s Chinese name, and then, “ You? He’s right here!” “Wait!” as I scramble back in the van, ”I don’t have the cameras and Mom will kill me!” In we go to a room maybe 30’x50’ and there are probably 30-40 people milling about with kids, people crying and laughing, and… where is he??????? Finally I spot the little Frankie wannabe (LB looks just like a good friend of D’s) in the arms of a man going across the room. “D, get the video going, he’s right there!”  D: “Where?” without a flinch of the camera. Me: “RIGHT THERE!” D: “Huh?” Yes, sometimes I want to strangle that boy! Finally (I’m sure it was all of a couple of seconds later!) D spots him and the video starts rolling. I’m glad I remembered that child, but I immediately forgot the other child (G)who was dutifully running around snapping photos to his heart’s content

LB was a little stiff when I first got him, but G got him some toys and in a few minutes we got a smile. (Of course D had obediently walked away to get some video of the other family with us so he was immediately recalled to duty on his primary mission) The smiles kept coming and soon the words. At first the words were quiet & subdued. During the ride to the hotel there was lots of laughter as he enjoyed being tickled and was thrilled by any big bumps in the road (let’s just say he was thrilled a lot!). Made it to the hotel where we were finally able to get our good friend, Cuddlebuns (aka” our oldest son” who’s actually MUCH older than I am [Now we’ll find out how often he reads the blog!]), on Skype via IM, to call the Momma to get on Skype so she can see her latest child in all his split pants glory. (If you don’t know what split pants are, let’s just suffice it to say that they allow one to stay clean and dry without the benefit of a diaper.) After a good chat with Momma & C and a brief one with the “oldest brother”, we took off and found an Italian place for lunch where LB had his first meal with us which was Spinach and Mozzarella Raviolis. Then back to the hotel for more signing of paperwork, and where we’re now enjoying just a few minutes peace( with just the occasional squeaking of him sucking the first two fingers of his left hand in his sleep.)

O and the best thing about split pants? They allowed LB to “express” his thoughts of the place just before we walked out the door to his new life!

Editor’s note: If you don’t quite get the whole “split pants” thing, here is an excerpt from a blog entry I wrote in 2010 when we were in Beijing (titled “The no good very bad parental units” August, 4, 2010):

Speaking of Chinese parenting, we have been surprised at the ubiquitous bare baby bottom. At the store, bare baby bottoms. On the street, bare baby bottoms. At the Forbidden City, not forbidden bare baby bottoms. Either the bottoms are completely bare or are peeking through the "split pants" that many of the babies wear. We asked Joy to reveal the story behind this phenomena. She said that the older generation does not think that it is good for babies to wear diapers in this hot weather. They fear the babies will become overheated and will get diaper rashes. This is apparently a hot topic on the internet for young parents. The bottom line (I am so cracking myself up) is that, because both parents often have to work, they rely on the older generation to care for their children while they are gone. Consequently the parents acquiesce and go along with it. And that's the naked truth, ar, ar.

 This guy has been "the voice" behind the camera that shot video of LB

 Here's LB not quite sure about this whole situation...

 Sideview of the splitpants (this is a "G-rated" blog, after all)

There's our boy!!!!

The Forbidden City or the Forever City?

Today, after passing briefly through Tiananmen Square (the world’s largest public square), we arrived at the Forbidden City. Constructed largely of material (logs and marble) that came from South China one to two thousand miles away, the logistics alone of building this massive place (about 2,000’ by 6,000’) is highly impressive.  When you’re tired from having climbed the Great Wall the day before, it seems rather daunting. As the only one other than the guide who had been there before, I was asked on several occasions, as we passed through another building into another courtyard before yet another building, if that building was the end yet.  I think I deflated them when I told them I thought we hadn’t yet gone a mile & it was more than that. Amazing places, but not something that can be well described by me or justified by any pictures, but here’s a small piece anyhow.

After that we went on a tour of a Hutong, a traditional but disappearing style of housing in Beijing.

 A honeymoon suite

In a more modern rickshaw, propelled by someone pedaling, not running

By the way most of these pictures were taken by Daniel & Gabriel.

Then a lunch with the group, some rest time and then dinner at KFC, oooh!, and an attempt at bed.

No good t-shirt sayings today, but I did like the name of one dish at KFC – Refreshing Funguses.

(Editor's note...Gotcha pictures are coming!! This is a slow process as James uploads the photos to me via e-mail and can attach only a few at a time.  I then upload it onto the blog once I go through the  4-5 e-mails to get a post.)

can...not...help...myself...must...blog

Can you see why I kept the blog while we were in China last time? You can see which one of us has to divulge all things at any given time!

I don't know when James will get to blogging about getting L.B., so I thought I'd give a quick update.  The hand-off was complete yesterday! L.B. is with his dad and older brothers!!!! He is happy and playful and has a mind of his own!  I envision some serious alpha child battles going on in this home. When I saw him, he had discovered the phone and was trying to make some calls (probably trying to order a pizza or call a taxi to take him away from those weird people).  He was getting into everything, which reminded me of certain other children around here....(did I already ask you to pray for us?).

The adoption becomes finalized today (their Tuesday, which should make certain members of my community group happy), so he will be legally ours!  I think I've used enough exclamation points, I think you can gauge my excitement, I'll reign it in and sign off, for now, hee hee.

Waiting (impatiently) on the home front, narrowly missing You Tube fame

Since I don't plan on venturing too far from this computer anytime soon (except to get WTs to bed), I figured I'd burn off some nervous energy (which is in abundant supply) by talking about  our wedding weekend.

The girls were slated to be flower girls in their cousin's wedding which took place last night.  As a quick aside, it is interesting to note that the last time our family was in China, C was a flower girl in our friends' wedding.   So if someone would like to ask her to be a flower girl in about six months, we would be happy as that would signal another trip to China!

Now, this wedding was a source of no small anxiety for me.  As you may have noticed, I did use the plural for girl.  That means the veteran, C, and the wildcard, K.  Let me add that the wedding was outdoors on property that had a phenomenal view and...dirt, lots of dirt.  And the girls would be wearing white dresses.  Can you envision why this might promote a sense of dread?

The rehearsal went really well, so I was hopeful that K might do okay.  She did give me a good reminder, however, when she broke loose during the final run-through, running down the small hill to the site of the ceremony where I was waiting for her, shouting at the top of her lungs, "I have to go shi-shi!!!!!" (which is the equivalent of going "number 1").  Mental post-it note reminder: make sure she goes to the bathroom before the wedding.

For whatever reason, she had a really bad night/early morning, waking up on and off from 2am until she finally got up at 6am.  Which of course meant that mom had a bad night/early morning.  Add to this that I was sharing a bed with C who kept kicking me during the night.  When I asked about that the next day, she said she had a dream she was sharing a bed with one of her aunts (Jewell or Joy or another one of her 5 "J" aunts) and she was kicking her leg for fun.  Uh huh, real fun.

Flash forward to about 10 minutes before the wedding is due to start.  I tell K that I will meet her down the hill just like we practiced.  As I turned to go with M in tow (who, by the way, offered to be the "handsome boy" in the wedding), K let out a huge wail and yelled "I want to stay with MOMMMMMYYYYYY!"  Trying not to melt into the dirt and create a mud puddle, I tried to calm her down and reason with her.  Nothing seemed to work.  The mother of the bride, my sister-in-law, tried to reassure me that if it didn't work out, it would be totally fine.  I also know that the bride will be totally understanding because she is the opposite of a bridezilla, which I have no word for right now, but she's really really sweet and understanding.

I really want K to do this, for my niece, but also for K.  I want her to overcome this and buck up like a trooper.  I decide to pray with her, thinking that might work.  She calms down and I ask her if she's ready to stay with her sister.  She responds with, "Nooooo, I want to stay with MOMMMMMMY!" At this point I am pleading in my mind to God, ready to make all kinds of promises He will laugh at because He knows me. 

An idea enters into my head (thank you God) to wait at the bottom of the hill to the side with K.  When the wedding party walks by, she can then join her sister for the short walk down the aisle.  I talk her through this and she seems like she might be okay with the idea.  I know it's a long shot, but it's worth a try.  As we are sitting waiting for the nine bridesmaids to file past, (I had a long time to think)  I suddenly had visions of K going down the aisle and doing something that will end up on You Tube.  I could just see the video going viral, titled "Meltdown after the maids" or "Flower girl faceplant," or "Agony in the aisle," or something like that.

The time came for C to file past.  I stood K up and asked if she wanted to go with her sister.  She nodded yes, joined her sister, and walked down the aisle like a champ.  Thank you Jesus!

The bride was beautiful, and the wedding was wonderful (kudos to my nephew for officiating like a pro!).  For my part, I have a special reminder of that day.  Remember when I was sitting to the side of where the bridal party was walking past? The day before, the bride warned me not to let the kids walk through that area.  You see, it had poison oak there.

Itchy and scratching and waiting to see my boy!!!

Stairs, lots and lots of stairs

Yup today’s big event was the Great Wall. Always impressive to look at, not always easy to climb. Although, I must admit, it was much nicer this time than last. Last time I made the mistake of deciding to run the stairs of our 26 story hotel three times the day before. It was 100,000 degrees outside last time while today it was cool with a great breeze. And last time there was Kara. She fell asleep in my arms just as we started climbing, and I had to climb with a sweaty pile of dead weight. Amazingly, I didn’t have a ton of pictures taken of me like I did last time. Gabriel seemed to really enjoy the wall. Why would I think that? The fact that he was near vibrating as we got there and then took off like a mountain goat risking the wrath of the father as he disappeared from sight, those might be clues.

Conquering the Great Wall

Great Wall Defenders

Also, went to a couple of tourist trap/history type places. They were interesting for learning about things like the making of things out of jade and a certain type of pots and other items made out of copper. We went to another Chinese restaurant for lunch and Pizza Hut for dinner. Pretty good pizza and at least some of us really like the Chinese food.

Not too much else to say about today, but here is a picture of my favorite translation for the day:

Here are some pictures from the previous day's activities:

Arriving at New Day Foster Home

Delivering goods

From the other side of the world

Wow. This is weird. Normally it is the better half that writes these blog entries. Unfortunately, that beautiful lady is at home with the three younger ones while I am here in China with the two oldest and, shortly, the soon to be youngest. I write this after our second morning here. We're all tired from time change and the added fact that the beds, well the beds… Let's see what the boys have used to describe them, G- "Why did they take so much time to put rocks in these beds?" D- "Concrete" G- "Solid steel with a sheet over it." So what has happened so far? Flight- pretty uneventful, but did meet some neat people. We met one guy on his way to North Korea to do work on water systems so as to reduce waterborne diseases. He's part of one of the few openly Christian groups allowed into the country. And he's retired from Anchorage FD so you can imagine we enjoyed talking. Yesterday, after a meeting going over all we were to do this trip and then getting rid of most of the money I carried with me, we headed off to New Day Foster Home to deliver goods we'd gathered together (thanks CG!) and enjoy a brief visit. We finally made it there at nap time, but at least got to see a few of the kids awake. It's a great thing they are doing there. Got back from there to have a few moments of rest before heading off to the acrobatic show. There I got rest once again, though I tried not to! It really is very impressive, kind of reminiscent of a Cirque du Soliel show. After that a group of us headed off to the Chinese restaurant just down from my wife's favorite place, the hypermart. I thoroughly enjoyed all of it, but some of our meat and potato friends weren't as thrilled.  As is often the case in other countries, the English translation may not always be spot on.  My favorite from yesterday, "Determined to pot all love." I saw it on a building as we drove past." I was guessing it was maybe a restaurant or a "collective", but then I remembered, I'm not in California any more.